Recently, I did a post on the seven people waiting when you fall (The Vulture, Vampire, Voyeur, Freak, Fixer, Father, and Friend). If you missed it, you can check it out by clicking here or you can tune in tonight at 6:30pm or 10:30pm to 90.9 KCBI and hear some of my thoughts on the subject. Once the show has aired, you can also listen to it online by clicking here. Be sure to check out some of the other radio shows I’ve done while you are there.

One of the seven individuals I discussed was the friend. This is the person who is loyal and genuinely wants you to succeed in life. You know them by how willing they are to celebrate with you when you’re succeeding, not just by how they help you up when you’ve fallen.

This got me thinking. Are there benefits to being a friend like this to others? Absolutely. Here are just a few I came up with:

  1. The credibility you gain: If you want people to trust you, you have to demonstrate your friendship by helping them succeed when there is nothing immediately in it for you. Notice I used the word “immediately.” I do not think there is anything wrong with acknowledging that we do and should get something from our friendships. In fact, we get lots of things: companionship, mentoring, sharing, emotional support, and a list of other benefits. We need friendships as much as we need life itself. In that sense, no action taken on behalf of a friend is totally selfless. If you are in a relationship that is one-sided (all take and no give) I would not call that a friendship. I might call it slavery, but not friendship. The true friend is not someone who gives and gives and gives and never gets anything in return. Rather, a true friend is one who is willing to set aside his or her needs for a time in order to help you acquire your needs for a time. When you help someone in this way, you gain credibility as a true friend and strengthen a bond that can last a lifetime.
  2. The future ally you secure: When people know that you genuinely care about their success, their loyalty to you grows. This is important to recognize, because there will come a time when you need their support in order to succeed yourself. If you have been a true friend, you will not have to feel guilty or anxious about asking them to respond in kind. Example: How likely are you to donate money to a person’s cause when they don’t even say hi to you at the office? Not likely, right? But think about that individual who always asks you about your kids, prayed for you when you had surgery, and wrote you a congratulations card when you got a promotion. I bet you’d be more likely to put up five bucks for their charity run. We have to stop being so self-focused, understanding that serving others leads to long term allies. One caution: when you call on an ally to help, the decision is still theirs to make. They might say no and that is okay. If we are simply keeping checks and balances on our investments into people, we will become very bitter. But if we freely “cast our bread upon the water” (as the saying goes), it will return to us in the end.
  3. The wisdom you acquire: The saying is, “Learn from other people’s mistakes.” I say, “Learn from other people’s successes.” When you participate in the process of another person’s success, you learn a lot vicariously through them. For example, Michael Hyatt, former CEO of Thomas Nelson Publishing Company, completed a book several years ago called Platform. It ended up on the New York Times Bestseller list. Prior to publishing the book, he had posted updates on how the book was coming along, asking for feedback, and sharing tidbits of his wisdom. I must admit, as an author, I was just a little bit jealous. “I wish I could ask advice from a network of 100,000+ followers anytime I wanted.” But instead of being bitter, I took the time to follow his progress and learn from him. After all, if he had aquired so many followers, he had to be doing something right. His success, in a small way, has become my success because of the knowledge I gained through his openness about the process. (And, yes, I did buy his book!)
  4. The new relationships you develop: When people see that you are a trustworthy friend, they will want to be your friend as well. Over time, you will find that you have created a network of friendships that will become a source of joy, encouragement, and help, both in times of trouble and great success.
  5. The sense of purpose you feel: When you learn to celebrate with others, you discover the true purpose for living life. My new motto on social networking sites is share the positive, the whole positive, and nothing but the positive. Why? Because social networking is not all about me. This is my opportunity to serve others in the virtual world, just like in the real world. There is nothing more exciting than being able to take part in a big or small way in the success of other people. My life is richer because of it. Yours can be too!!

Question: How have you benefited from celebrating the successes of others?

I’m not a diehard fan of zombie movies, but I must admit I found World War Z entertaining. (If your interested, you can listen to a radio show I did recently on the psychology of the undead by clicking here.) In zombie flicks there is always a scene were the protagonist (the living) and the antagonist (the undead) have a chance to observe one another from a place of relative safety, often depicted as a chain link fence. Both have the desire to destroy one another but amid that destructive force lays a hint of curiosity. What’s it like to be on the other side?

There are so many of us today who feel like the “living dead.” We are going through the motions of life, but nothing seems to bring us pleasure or fulfillment. I’m not sure how this feeling developed or whether people of centuries past could relate to it. I do know that years ago, when someone in a community suffered, the people of that community suffered with them. During World War II, you might drive through your neighborhood and see a star in the window, representing a family member who died. People would bring meals to one another and stop by for a comforting word or two. Today we lack that kind of camaraderie because many of our communities are virtual. On social media sites like facebook, twitter, and google+, we don’t have to interact with each others’ suffering if we don’t want to. Recently, I was scrolling through the news feed on facebook and I began reading a post that described a recent disaster in the family. Without even thinking, I skipped past it to a funny youtube video another friend had posted.

That separation, that chain link fence, can also leave us wondering, “Am I the only one that feels dead?” When all you see are vacation pictures, delicious meals, funny videos, the best images of people smiling and living life to the fullest, it is easy to start questioning the fullness of our own reality. Here are some actions I’ve found helpful to fight that feeling:

1. Take a break from social media for a while and reach out to a LIVE person in your REAL community.
2. Stop focusing on the grand and amazing events of life, and stay present in the moment. Learn to find beauty in the ordinary. (A hot cup of coffee on a cold day, your favorite pen when you’re doing paperwork, the giggles of your son or daughter, a wet kiss from your pet.)
3. Remember that what you see in the virtual world is often an illusion. Everyone is human. Everybody hurts. Don’t look to social media to fill a void in you that only another live human being can fill.
4. Stop watching the lives of other people and start doing some living yourself! One moment at a time.

Questions: What activities in life bring you the most joy? How can you infuse more of those activities into your daily routine? What are some of the small things in life that you’ve been ignoring that might actually encourage and lift your spirits? Stay mindful of them through the next week and see how your attitude about life changes.

 

 

 

 

We all have a story and that is why I love what I do. I get to hear people’s stories every day, and yes, they are often filled with pain, but whose life story isn’t? The exciting thing is that in every person’s story, there is always room for redemption. That’s why I was excited to talk to Rebecca Carrell. Some of you know her from the KCBI Morning Show on 90.9. But many of you don’t know her back story, the one that led her to radio in the first place. She reminds us that when you have a desire you want filled, God always brings you home to the place where that desire can best be filled.

Check out Rebecca’s blog at www.loveserveshine.com and be sure to listen in to the program tonight at 6:30pm and 10:30pm on 90.9 KCBI. We will not only here Rebecca’s story, but also talk about the challenges that parents face in deciding how much social media should be allowed in the home with their kids. If you can’t listen tonight, you can also listen to it tomorrow once it’s posted online by clicking here.

We’ve all heard that definition of insanity: “doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.” But if that same thing, done over and over again, is a healthy activity for everyone else, why is it insanity for me? The key is two-fold: motive and measure of success.

THE MOTIVE: Many individuals, though driven and quite successful in various areas of their lives, are in fact motivated by fear: fear of failure, judgment, rejection, loneliness, physical pain, death, or in some cases, the great unknown. There are times when fear should motivate us. Fear might motivate us to take a cab rather than ride with a drunk driver. Fear might lead us to lock our doors and set the alarm when we leave for an extended vacation. In both of these instances, the fear is brief and serves as a reminder to do something smart. Once the action is completed, we can release the fear fairly easily. The fear serves to keep us on track with our main goals, motives, and objectives. You don’t get in the car with a drunk driver because you could die and never fulfill your dream of becoming a world-famous ballet dancer (I didn’t say it was my dream!). You lock your doors and set the alarm because you don’t want a thief stealing your Russian nesting doll collection, the one you plan to sell on the Antique Road Show exhibit when you return. The fear is subservient to the greater purpose of your life. For individuals with unhealthy fear, the fear itself is the motive. “I don’t want to be afraid. Therefore, I will do X, Y, Z and maybe X, Y, Z again…and again and again!” The goal is simply to keep fear at bay. This is when our motives become toxic to our existence.

THE MEASURE OF SUCCESS: How do you know when a thought or behavior is enough? I admit the question doesn’t have an exact measurable answer. Healthy thoughts and behaviors lie on a continuous spectrum. This makes it difficult to challenge an anxious person on their fear-based activities. But at some point, the behavior ceases to be a healthy means to a purposeful end and becomes a meaningless end to an unhealthy purpose. Here are some examples:

1. Diet and Exercise: Healthy when we are staying in shape to accomplish our goal of running a marathon, playing with the grandkids, or looking good for our spouse. Unhealthy when we are afraid of getting fat or failing to live up to an ideal, afraid of losing someone’s love or being rejected by a stranger.
2. Safety: Healthy when we recognize carelessness and fix it. Unhealthy when we believe we can control the uncontrollable events in our lives.
3. Religious practices: Healthy when they draw us closer to God and to others. Unhealthy when they push us away from the true tenets of the faith.

So consider where you need to STOP doing the things you think you SHOULD:

1. Maybe everyone else is dieting and exercising and you need to eat more and rest!
2. Maybe you need to stop being so responsible and trying to control all the events of your life.
3. Maybe you need to throw out some of those valuable trinkets or paperwork you’ve been holding onto for years.
4. Maybe you are so structured in your life that you need to allow for some messiness.
5. Maybe God wants you to stop confessing your sins for a while and start basking in His Grace.

Whatever needs to change, remember to check your motive and your measure of success and remind yourself that sometimes more isn’t better. Sometimes it’s just more!

Questions: What are some things that you think you should do that would be hard for you to stop? How can you change your perspective and try something different?

Originally posted on Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain:

Have you ever heard the song by REM, “Everybody Hurts”? Well, it’s true! We all go through difficult seasons in our lives, either because of the things others do to us or because of the things we do to ourselves. The people in our lives play a vital role in whether or not we have the strength to get back up on our feet and keep moving through life’s journey. I was considering the types of people that wait for us on the way down. Who are they and how should we respond to them. Here’s my list:

The Vulture: This is the person who is openly antagonistic. They have been waiting for this moment as long as they have known you and they have no qualms about letting you and others know their pleasure in your pain. This is the boss that can’t wait to fire you, the frenemy…

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Have you ever heard the song by REM, “Everybody Hurts”? Well, it’s true! We all go through difficult seasons in our lives, either because of the things others do to us or because of the things we do to ourselves. The people in our lives play a vital role in whether or not we have the strength to get back up on our feet and keep moving through life’s journey. I was considering the types of people that wait for us on the way down. Who are they and how should we respond to them. Here’s my list:

The Vulture: This is the person who is openly antagonistic. They have been waiting for this moment as long as they have known you and they have no qualms about letting you and others know their pleasure in your pain. This is the boss that can’t wait to fire you, the frenemy who posts the embarrassing picture on their Facebook account, the sibling who uses you to get in good with mom and dad, the church member who wants you off the pulpit, the journalist who smears your public image. The list could go on and on. Nine times out of ten, the best option with the vulture is to keep your head high, ignore them, and distance yourself from any further interactions. Let your actions be louder than your words, be the better person, and trust that they will learn their lesson from someone else someday. An old proverb says, “Don’t cast your pearls before swine!!”

The Vampire: The vampire is definitely an antagonist, but in a more subtle way. They pretend to be your friend, invite you to open up to them in the midst of your struggle, and then take advantage of you in your weakness. They are smooth and seductive. Think traveling elixir salesman or corner prostitute! And they may not be selling anything material. They might simply want you to buy into their philosophy about life, feed their psychological need for power, or use you to assuage their own hurts. Your suffering is only a means to accomplishing their own purposes in life. They will suck your blood and keep coming back for more if you let them. The way to protect yourself against a vampire is to hold your cards close to the chest. You might be suffering intensely and they always seem to be right there ready to help, but smile and make them believe you’re doing just fine without them. Tell the salesman politely you’re not interested at this time and then hang up the phone! Don’t wait for the rest of the sales pitch.

The Voyeur: The voyeur doesn’t necessarily have a hidden agenda, but they will milk you for all the juicy details of your struggle. After a while, you get the sense that they really don’t care about you. They just love a good story. And trust me, someone who loves a good story is usually a magnificent story teller. The voyeur loves being in the know and spreading news. They feel better wallowing in other people’s suffering. Here is one way to test whether or not someone in your life is a voyeur: tell them something exciting and positive that has happened in your life and see if they take as much interest. You will know very quickly who your true friends are by who is able to celebrate with you, not just mourn with you.

The Freak: This person does not have a malicious motive. They simply “can’t handle the truth!” (Said in an aggressive, airy, Jack Nicholson voice). Usually, the freak is someone very close to you who suffers when you do. They love you desperately, but freak out when you’re in pain. They are empathetic to a fault. You wish they’d take your shoes off after one lap around the track, let alone a mile. With these people, you may have to share burdens gradually over time. Let the issue sink in so that they have time to process it and come to terms with it. In doing so, you will create less damage in the long term.

The Fixer: The fixer is the opposite of the freak. Lots of solutions. Very little empathy. I knew someone who did informal counseling who said, “Look, I’ll meet with you for one session. You do what I say? Great! You don’t? I’ve got better things to do with my time!” Now, to be sure. Individuals like this might have a lot of helpful wisdom to pass on, but you need tough skin and the ability to take everything they say with a grain of salt. They have a cookie cutter solution to every problem. Some advice might be worth chewing on and some of it, well, in the words of the comedian, Jim Gaffigan, treat it like a Hot Pocket: “Open package and place directly in toilet!!”

The Father:  The sage. The guru. The sensei. An older individual who is not in competition with you, has a deep yearning to mentor and genuinely wants to be a listening ear and an advisor in your life. Draw from them deeply, but realize that they may not be entirely able to relate to your circumstances. Every generation is faced with nuances in the suffering and pain they face. Culture, technology, styles, and relationships change over time, so look for a wise man that is willing to remain teachable and empowers you to tell your story. Remember as people age they naturally become fixers (minus the attitude), in part because they have had a lot of experiences we have not. The good ones remain humble in spite of all their knowledge. Hold onto them like a precious jewel (or your i-phone these days!!)

The Friend:  This person doesn’t have all the answers, but they can relate to your struggle. They care about you, want to see you succeed, and will continue to walk with you every step of the way. There is loyalty here. A history. A brotherhood or sisterhood. You may have disagreements, but if someone butts into your inner circle, they will fall on their sword for you. Cherish these relationships. Be that kind of person to someone else. If you have one or two of these people in your life, you can weather any storm.

Question: What kinds of people wait for you when you fall? What kind of person are you when others fall?

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No, there is not a typo in the title above. My wife and I saw the movie, Saving Mr. Banks, several weeks ago and we both loved it (even though I tried to convince her beforehand to see Lone Survivor instead!!). After the movie I thought about how enthralled I was by the plot, the acting, the scenery, and the lessons embedded in the story. I was captivated. My attention was fully engaged. I found myself wishing I could be that focused in real life. Unfortunately, I’m not.

This past week, I had a breakfast scheduled with one of my good friends, and I completely forgot about it. To make matters worse, we had seen each other the day before, and he specifically asked if we were still on for it. When I woke up the next morning and saw his text asking what happened, I was mortified.

Back-tracking the events of the previous day, I was able to do a “post-mortem” on my failure. I had a speaking engagement the day before and put my phone on do-not-disturb and then forgot to reverse the settings. Subsequently, the alarm on my phone did not go off the next morning and I over slept. Even so, I could have made it to the breakfast, but without the reminder, my mind went completely blank. (Now do you get the title?) I started my daily routine without even thinking about the appointment. It wasn’t until I finished some work on the computer that I checked my phone. By that time, it was too late.

Thankfully, my friend was gracious, but I still felt bad. It got me thinking. How should we respond when our minds go blank? When we fail to live up to the commitments we have made, is there any hope of redemption and restoration. Here are some responses that I have found helpful:

1.Own the failure: When you commit to something, it becomes your responsibility no matter what excuses you may have for why you failed. Don’t use the excuse that it was out of your hands, even if it really was. You are welcome to give an explanation for your failure, but don’t expect that the explanation will sufficiently satisfy the offended party. That is something they have to decide.

2.Owe the friend: If at all possible, try to make amends. With my friend, I offered to reschedule for lunch (so that I would be sure to be awake in time – I haven’t slept until noon since college), foot the bill (we normally go Dutch when we get together), and step it up a notch (Let’s just say, I didn’t take him to 7-Eleven for a chili dog). Now, I recognize in doing these things that they don’t negate the time of his that I wasted, but they were gestures of good faith to demonstrate my sorrow and say that I do value the relationship.

3.Oust the feeling: My tendency is to hold on, to feel embarrassed and uncomfortable when I make mistakes like this. But if I do, it actually means I am too proud to let my friends know that I am human, and in any relationship, this is the inevitable realization, the longer you are together. So I have to be willing to forgive myself and let it go, move forward, and accept mercy and grace.

4.Omit the Frequency: There are times when we just blow it. But some failures become patterns of behavior we have to change. If your friends start calling you Mr. Blank, you might have a problem with forgetfulness. There are two ways to respond. We can say, “Oh well, that’s just me” or we can chose to change. It may require work. We may need help from friends, family, books, coaches, a therapist, or even a physician, but we need to recognize when we have areas of our lives that need to improve and really make an effort to change. Remember, excellence is a process. Don’t give up on it. Don’t give up on yourself!!

Question: How do you respond when you blow it? Are there ways that you have found helpful to make amends? What successes have you had in overcoming unhealthy patterns in your life?

In 1999, The Matrix was released and instantly became a box office sensation. It is the story of Neo, a man who confronts the true nature of reality and then battles against those who had been trying to control his consciousness.

Before his epiphanous transformation, Neo is given a choice by the leader of the rebellion. He can take a blue pill and remain ignorant of true reality or he can take the red pill and face whatever may come. Obviously, he takes the red pill or there would be no story. But what would you have done? It seems like a no brainer, right? After all, don’t we always want to know the truth? Maybe, maybe not.

I thought about how often I say I want to know the truth. When confronted with it, however, I do whatever I can to forget it. If I could give back the red pill and take the blue one instead, I would. Think about how often we play this game in a day’s time:

  1. Honey, do these pants make me look fat?
  2. So, how did I do on my presentation? Any way I can improve my delivery?
  3. Listen, I want to know what you really think. What’s the deal with my coworkers? Why don’t they like me?
  4. Dude, I want you to be my accountability partner. Be sure to call me out on stuff I’m doing wrong, okay?
  5. Doctor Spock, do you have any tips on how I can be a better parent?

Now think about it. In asking questions, seeking advice, desiring accountability and feedback, do we really want to know the truth or would we prefer that one-sided answer that only feeds our illusion of truth? Think about what we do when we don’t get the answer we want:

  1. We disqualify the message: “Well, controlling rage might be good advice for other parents, but my anger isn’t that bad. Besides, my kids are going to grow up learning respect. My daddy was a drill sergeant and look how I turned out!”
  2. We discredit the messenger: “What a know-it-all! I guarantee you, he hasn’t given a single presentation worth listening to. I mean, really, I guess he’s got a right to his opinion, but in this situation, he’s clueless!”
  3. We discount the relationship: “I know she means well, but I’d don’t think she really understands where I’m coming from. If she had taken the time to listen to my side, if she knew me better, I don’t think she would have come to the same conclusion!”
  4. We dissociate the experience: “I’m sorry, can you repeat that last part? The part right after ‘now this is very important.’” (That’s a tribute to Get Smart, BTW)
  5. We discourage the self: Well, that proves it. I’m a failure. What is the point of trying anyway? Thanks for giving me the truth. I’m thinking of that line from A Few Good Men: “You can’t handle the truth!!”

Facing truth can be daunting, because truth always changes us and change is hard. My challenge to myself and to you is to stick with the red pill, be teachable and don’t get discouraged. Other people don’t always have the right answers or the truth we need to hear, but at least consider their thoughts before you write them off completely. Allow others to speak truth into your life and do not be afraid to change because of it. Don’t be like the person who looks in the mirror, sees a dirty face, and then forgets to wash it. And if you are the type of person that gets discouraged easily in the face of truth, then read my previous post, Go Hard or Go Home. Hopefully, it will encourage you.

Question: How have you faced truth today? Did you take the red pill or the blue pill and why?

 

 

When you work out consistently at the same gym for a while, you begin to notice people. For me, there is one guy in particular that has, for better or for worse, left a lasting impression on my mind. Without fail, at 7 am every morning, he comes strutting in, all 275 lbs of him, pointing and shouting at people across the gym, “Go hard or go home, baby!!!” I’ve never been able to figure out if he actually knows the people he is shouting at, but if he’s trying to meet people, he should really take time to read Dale Carnegie’s book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. If he’s ever directed the challenge to me personally, I could not tell you because when I see him coming, I avert my eyes, turn up the volume on my i-pod and start praying, “Dear God, please don’t let him eat me!”

On one occasion (once my panic attack subsided), I considered his statement: “Go hard or go home.” How many of us have applied this statement to our lives? Here are some examples I thought of:

  1. Dieting – “Oh well, I gave in and had that pizza. I might as well eat the cannoli too.”
  2. Exercise – “I’m so tired this morning. I think I’ll go tomorrow when I am feeling a little more rested.”
  3. Work – “I’m sorry, honey, I am not going to make it home for dinner tonight. This marketing presentation has to be perfect or else I’m going to bomb it tomorrow.”
  4. Parenting – “I am such a failure as a parent. All the other mom’s are working a full time job while homeschooling their seven children and training for the Hawaii Iron-man.”
  5. Ministry – “I’m just one voice. What I say or do doesn’t really matter. Anyway, the minister is the one who has been called to this. He can handle it.”

I could continue the list ad infinitum, but the real point is that anyone who tries to ascribe to the “go hard or go home” mindset, usually ends up going home, crawling into bed, and watching reruns of their favorite 80’s television show. Why? Because no one can go hard all the time and those that do end up burning out. “Go hard or go home” is an example of what professional therapists call “all-or-nothing” thinking.  Some more examples:

  1. “If I can’t be perfect, then I must be a failure.”
  2. “If I can’t be at every meeting, then I’m not going to volunteer at all.”
  3. “If this one girl does not find me attractive, then I must be ugly.”
  4. “If I don’t have 5 million followers on twitter, then what’s the point of tweeting?”

This mindset affects our actions and it affects our view of ourselves. For example, let’s say that you would like to start working out, but you don’t because you’re not in shape. (Consider the logic of that statement first, by the way.) Well, your goal might simply be to get to the gym every day. How intensely you work out doesn’t matter at this point. You just need to get there! Accomplish that step, and then look at hopping on the treadmill the next time. If you are socially isolating yourself because you fear being rejected, consider this: if you reach out to 100 people and 80% of them reject you, that still leaves you 20 people who want to be your friend. Instead of looking at the 80% of rejections, consider that you just went from 0 to 20!

How about your view of yourself? If you are not the star athlete, the top sales associate, the supermom or dad, the greatest [fill in the blank], that does not mean you are stupid, unsuccessful, insignificant, or a failure. Most of us are somewhere in between. Striving for excellence is a process, one that requires pacing and patience. Striving for perfection is insanity and will only make you miserable.

So the next time you hear the statement, “Go hard or go home” consider these alternatives:

  1. Something is better than nothing.
  2. Perfection is not the goal, excellence is.
  3. Excellence is always achievable if you remember that excellence is a process that never ends, requires patience and hard work, and allows for our continual growth, no matter where we are on the journey.
  4. Growth occurs in ebbs and flows. Don’t get discouraged when you get tired, fail to meet preset expectations or disappoint others. Remind yourself of #’s 1, 2, and 3 and keep moving forward.  

Question: What do you think when you hear the expression, “Go hard or go home!”? Does it motivate or discourage you? What helps you to achieve the goals that you have set for yourself?

So I have a few questions for you to consider in anticipation of my lecture at Park Cities Presbyterian Church on September 30th at 11:45 am (Did I mention they will be providing lunch free of charge?! – you must register, though, so email leslie.peacock@pcpc.org for details.)

Questions:

What are the kinds of situations that tend to make you angry?

Who are the people who always seem to rub you the wrong way?

How do you typically respond when you are angry?

When is it okay to be angry?

Have you ever used anger in a positive way? How did you do it?

We will be exploring some of these questions on Monday, September 30th, as well as some of the techniques for effectively USING anger instead of LOSING it.

Hope to see you there.
David

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I am a board certified psychiatrist, author, speaker and the Director of Counseling and Psychology at Criswell College in Dallas Tx. I also serve as an adjunct professor at Dallas Theological Seminary. I have a passion for helping people through painful circumstances, be they physical illnesses of the brain, psychological conditions of the mind, social problems of everyday life, and/or spiritual crises of faith and worldview.

Disclaimer

All information provided is for educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for a professional evaluation or treatment. If you are experiencing emotional distress, please contact a mental health professional. Dr. Henderson cannot respond to inquiries about prescription refills, or medical or psychiatric emergencies over the internet. If you are a patient in need of assistance, please contact Dr. Henderson’s office directly, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room.

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